Saturday, July 23, 2011

I look better alone

I look better when I'm all by myself. You do to. There's no one there to point out your flaws or push on your buttons, so as to reveal those spots in your personality that are undesirable. What do we do with that information? The fact that we're all better in isolation? Do we stay isolated? Do we lean into the people that either make feel like running away or that make us shine? These are questions I've been asking myself lately.

I've been thoroughly enjoying my children since they've been home this summer, and the thought of homeschooling has flitted its way into my mind. You know, the times when I'm sitting on the edge of the pool, the kids are happily swimming, and the birds are singing. I've thought, "Bah! What's so hard about this whole kids-home-all-the-time bit? Anyone can do this. Except then there are the moments when they're fighting over whose day it is to sit in the backseat of the van, and I say, "Ah, yes, public school...such a fine institution. I mean, my tax dollars are hard at work anyway."

Honestly though, we all wrestle with either our bratty brother or sister pushing our buttons, while out in the world with them. Or our neighbor. Or our friends. Or....or. Choosing to lay aside hurts and move forward is a lot easier said than done. I'm practicing that, so when I'm not alone, and I'm out with you, I can still look as good as I do right now. I don't just want to look good, I want to actually be as good as I feel. And by "good", I don't mean goody-two-shoes. I mean honestly gracious and loving. These feelings don't come naturally to any of us, and are a conscious decision each and everyday.

My turn to sit in the back!

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